there's only one word that can explain this:

DEAD.

or

DIEDED.

whichever suits your fancy.

i find twitter a much simpler place to talk some shit.

so until i have some mood, if any, to post something significant on this blog, this will remain the way it is.

laters.

never jump to conclusions

recently, i made a conclusion that i was not gonna make it there; a lost cause.

until i tried.

and heck, there was indeed some hope in it.

well, i didn't exactly get what i wanted, but at least i'm given a chance now.

chances are better than nothing at all eh?

now all i have to do is work for it.

the problem is; nothing comes easy, and with a price.



"take what you get, leave nothing behind."

so close, so far

I wake up all alone, somewhere unfamiliar
Been gone so many days, I’m losing count
When I think of home, I see your face
I know I have to wait…

So close, yet so far
It’s tearing me apart
What I would do to be there with you
So close yet so far
It’s tearing me apart
What I would do to be back with you

I miss hearing your laughter
And all the little things
Forgotten what it’s like to hold you
Cause where I am right now so unforgiving
It’s numbing everything

So close, yet so far
It’s tearing me apart
What I would do to be there with you
So close yet so far
It’s tearing me apart
What I would do to be back with you

So promise
No matter how long it takes for me to get back to you
You’ll wait for me.

I promise
No matter how far away I go I’ll come back for you
Just wait and see...

here we go again

back to school.

with less ppl around.

more subjects.

more classes.

at late hours.

on fridays.

yay?

:/

word of the day

un⋅der⋅per⋅form

–verb (used with object), verb (used without object)

to perform less well than (another of its kind, a general average, etc.) or less well than expected

---

Origin:

UNDER- + PERFORM

Related forms:

un⋅der⋅per⋅for⋅mance, noun

___________________________________________________________________

how come i can never get what i want? it's always like that now. but it wasn't like that. am i past my prime? or is there something wrong? is it just me? or is it something else? even i can't answer that question.

if i were to look on the bright side, i'll say "well at least i didn't fail." but that's not what i want. passing is what i call easy peasy.

set aside my repeated underperformances.

it's the underlying reason that really matters.

how am i gonna qualify for exchange if this shit keeps happening? and it's abit too late to make anything change now. i just can't sit here for a whole damn year.

i'm just...so so so sorry.

time stands still

every minute seems to be passing slower and slower.

and it is, rather unbearable.

and truth be told; i miss you.

wait, i must have left it somewhere here...

i think i've lost my mind sitting at home doing NOTHING.

absolutely NOTHING.

it's suicidal i tell u...

you spin my head right round right round...

life has been giving me a hell of a HEADACHE recently.

first, i'm broke.

second, i'm still broke.

third, i will still be broke.

so basically, yea, i'm broke.

then i end up spending on things i SHOULD not and DO NOT intend to spend on.

after that i end up having whatever cash i have go MISSING for no apparent reason.

nice la.

then now i'm sick-ish. literally.

what a joke.

i wonder how am i gonna survive the next 2 weeks or so.

i think i have DIEDED.


FML.

Q: what does not have wings and flies?

A: time.

yes, time. with a snap of the finger exams are over.

or is it just the time i take to make a new post. whatever.

managed to survive exams, which consists of 2 (out of 3) papers. lasted only 4days though. deferred the last one (of which i have not formally settled). hopefully can hustle. need to prove a point. bah.

not to mention a massive toothache. massive gum infection. sakit sial.

since i'm the first to finish my exams (i think), i am bored. damn bored. barely anyone else finished their papers. so no one to call to chill. is having a damnshortperiodcrammedupstudyperiodandendexamsearly a good thing, or otherwise. u decide.

been wasting my time (and money) on almost daily trips to AC for foos and CS since MY exams ended. how la dei?. apart from that, i've been wasting my life on rock legends on facebook. pretty addictive. and don't tell me i'm lifeless. cause that's a fact i already know.

FML.

FML. twice.

i've gotta plan nicely for my next month or so, otherwise it will be a HELL of a holiday. literally, HELL. what's the point of holidays if u can't make full (not to mention any) use of it eh?

will make pointless rants when i am free. until then.

time is of the essence

i just realized that finals is 3 weeks away.

which recently i thought was more than a month away.

wow.

foosball

the silent killer.

next thing you know your wallet is left with small blue notes...

z.

within the next 24 hours...

...i is having to trying to becoming the superman. is because:

1. i is no car until tomorrow.

2. i is staying in sri petaling.

3. i is going to a party at duta vista tonight.

4. i is having futsal tournament tomorrow morning in sunway.

5. i is going to drink tonight.

6. i is need to travel to sunway in the morning.

7. i is no car.

8. i is going to have difficulty waking up.

9. i is need to go to setiawangsa tonight.

10. but i is no car.

11. and i is leave duta vista late.

12. i is want to play well.

13. but i is cannot goyang during game.

14. i is need to collect car after that.

15. i is confuzzled. how la?

=\

sometimes...

...it hurts to see some things when it's too late.

oh wait.

i think 'sting' would be much more appropriate.

oh well.

=\

timeframes

sometimes i just doesn't understand how some decisions can be made more comfortably in weeks rather than months. i'm starting to wonder if the former is longer timeframe than the latter =\

people just define time differently. or maybe there's a season to everything. before, after, soon, later, just now, coming soon, wait ar?

but this is something i just won't know, will i?

i guess it all worked out after all. not sure for who though.

some people are more available to others and some people are less available to me (although apparently someone said i was the one on the frontpage, but whatever)

besides, i'm here and you're there. meh. but i won't be surprised at forcemoves. the intention was there. so was the plan. i had, well, none :D

so you can put the blame on me aite.

well whatever it is doesn't matter no more to me.

right now, all i can do is just...smile :)

"...what it meant to be / will eventually / be a memory / of a time when i tried so hard;
and got so far; but in the end; it doesn't even matter..."

not again

oops i got jacked again.

getting used to it.

ain't a good thang though.

but whatever man.

have you ever...

...been jacked?

i have.

i call it the ultimate jack.

no more, no less.

*claps*

what has the world turn into?

when i walk past the mirror...

..."WHO THE FUCK IS THAT??"

not part of my plan but i did it. did it, but half length became no length. mahai. now i regret. partly due to technicalities but wtf man. still got cocked.

yes, i cut my damn hair. my hair. my maire. mauneh!!

when i wake up i'm supposed to see some messed up bitch in the mirror. but no. i see...WHAT?! where ma fro' maannnn?!

it's so bad, that even when i walk alone i'll be thinking, "who the fuck is behind me? oh wait, it's MY shadow." -.-

seriously, i can't anyone passing by a mirror and not recognizing that motherfucker-you-supposed-to-see-in-a-mirror.

sucks la. omffg.

took me a year plus to get that long. plus i haven't messed with it yet. so much for the cornrows.

not gonna take anyone's advice/orders/complaints to cut it short no more. after this it's my way on the highway. gg.

is anybody out there?

can anybody out there hear me?
cause I can't seem to hear myself
can anybody out there see me?
cause I can't seem to see myself
there's gotta be a heaven somewhere
can you save me from this hell?
can anybody out there feel me?
cause I can't seem to feel myself.

losing my way, keep losing my way.

can you help me find my way?

krazy

background music: krazy - pitbull ft lil jon

my momma call me krazy.

my papa call me krazy.

....

woot.

-___-